Self-esteem is how we value ourselves, your self-esteem can be lowered by not meeting internal expectations, or not being able to meet social expectations, this can lead into developing a habit of letting negative thoughts overpower your positive thoughts and can prevent you from trying new things for fear of failure or lack of belief in yourself. The good news is self-esteem is not a fixed state and can be changed, with time and effort you can raise your self-esteem. Here are a few tips to get you started:
1. Morning Walk – Start the day with a 15/30 minute walk at a relaxed pace, in a park or around nature would be best. As nature is known to be naturally calming this will help you to relax your mind allaying the fuel for any negative thoughts, walk slowly and enjoy your environment. Look for things which make you smile and be aware of any negative thoughts, put them into soft bubbles and let them float away. Send them away and carry on enjoying your walk and the positive thoughts that may be seeping through your relaxed mind.
2. Eat Healthy – Add an Orange juice or fruit juice of your choice to your breakfast to kick start your day and be mindful of your diet, keep as much fruit and veg in your diet as you can especially with your main meals. The best way to create a diet that suits you is to listen to your body – keep a mental note of how you feel 45-60mins after you’ve had the food – do you feel like you want to snooze, lack energy and have a low mood or are you all bouncy and full of energy? (Listen to your body, it will guide you)
3. Positive Quotes – Find a positive or motivational quote that suits or motivates you and put it on your mirror and make it a habit to read it daily.
4. Try a new Hobby or Interest – Make a list of interests & hobbies that have been sitting dormant on your ‘I’d love to do’, ‘will do’ or ‘must must do’ lists. Choose the one thing that brings out the most excitement and passion in you. You’ll be doing something you love, you’ll be out and about instead of ruminating and the chances are you will be meeting fun like minded people you can bounce off. Don’t get rid of that list of yours just yet, you have a whole new life just waiting to be discovered!
5. Pamper yourself – This can be anything from a new piece of accessory such as a scarf, hat, cute shoes or even a whole new outfit. If it’s not too challenging try a new look or a color you haven’t tried before. If ever you were looking for the perfect excuse, look no further, this is the time to book yourself a guilt free manicure, you’ll be walking around with flirty fingers and not even know it (instant boost!!)
6. Give back – smile at someone, give way to someone in traffic, volunteer for a cause close to your heart, even with the tiniest of selfless acts you have made a difference to the universe.
7. Remove or distance yourself from negative people – (Also known as destructive people), if you are spending time with people who are making regular negative comments about you, take a step back and spend less time with these people. If possible, withdraw from them completely as these characters can be soul destroying. Spend more time with people who appreciate all the wonderful qualities that you as an individual have to offer to this world, yourself and your family & friends.
8. The negativity fast – For the next few weeks set one day a week to take the negativity fast – during this day be mindful of negative thoughts let them go and replace them with positive thoughts. Be aware of negative language and negative talk seeping into your conversations. Ask a family member or close friend, especially someone you spend a lot of time with to help you or do it together! Try and adapt this discipline into your everyday life. The key is to be mindful of your thoughts and language.
9. The three minute positivity break – make it a daily habit to take 3 minutes to stop and reflect, right down 3 to 5 things that have made you happy or things that you appreciate about yourself. This will be a daily reminder of all your wonderful qualities to keep your self-esteem up.
10. Happy music – Put together a collection of songs that make you feel happy and give you a mood boost! Avoid or remove any music that has negative memories attached to it even if it is a happy song, remove from your lists any sad songs or songs that deflate your spirit. Remember music is the fuel for your soul and spirit, it can lift you high or bring you crashing down. Listen to the right music and you will be floating around, twisting and turning to the music, you’ll feel truly alive.
11. Walk happy – walk with a spring in your walk, float around like your space is your stage and you’re the lead, head held high shoulders up and smile. Walk like you have a purpose and most importantly love your space.
12. Meditate – you can join a buddhist centre, meditation group, take up a yoga class or just take out 30 minutes in the evening. If you are living with other people ask not to be disturbed “It’s my meditation time!”. Find a quiet place sitting down or lying down, close your eyes (if you can) and listen to relaxing meditation music. There is a plethora of meditation CDs out there, find something that you connect with, let any worries or thoughts float away in soft floating bubbles, drifting further and further away from you and let your mind lead you to a calm place.
13. Bedtime, time to reflect – reflect on positive thoughts, have a list or notepad under your pillow or on your bedside table with a pen ready at hand. Write at least 5 things you love or appreciate about yourself – this can be anything from how well you thought you looked today, turning up for that meditation class again, to carrying out a selfless deed to help someone else. There is no reason you can’t complement yourself on something you would quite happily and easily commend a family member, friend or even a stranger on!
Be you – be happy!!